Don't Look Back (The Becky Chronicles, Book 1) Read online

“You think you’re ready to walk out of here?”

  “Yes?” She giggled nervously.

  “Okay. Let’s do the same as we did before. We’ll walk out together very slowly.”

  Lynn nodded. We slowly opened the door.

  “Are you ladies ok?” Angie was standing in front of the bar.

  I nodded. “We have someone here to drive us home.”

  Angie watched us as we walked out the door.

  “Oh, my gosh! You two are trashed!” Dawn stood there laughing at us.

  I held out my keys and Dawn quickly snatched them out of my hand. I don’t know how we walked to my little black Honda, but thankfully, we managed to get into it without falling down.

  “Be careful driving and don’t scratch my baby.”

  Dawn rolled her eyes. “Who called whom?”

  She had a point.

  I closed my eyes. BIG mistake. It felt like I was falling. I checked with Lynn to see if she was alright, but she kept on giggling. I guess that’s a yes. It was quiet except for the classic rock station that was playing.

  “Fuck men.” Lynn shouted and then burst into giggles again.

  Dawn looked over at me questioningly. I shrugged my shoulders.

  Not my story to tell.

  “Lynn is staying at the inn, so you can just take us there.”

  “Ok. I’m going to call my friend, Rachel, so she can meet us there.”

  I guess I dozed after that, because the next thing I knew Dawn was shaking me.

  “We’re here.”

  You have never seen anything funnier than two drunk chicks trying to slide a key to get into a room. Funniest. Thing. Ever.

  “You gonna stay the night?” Lynn asked.

  “Yes. There’s no way I can drive. I can’t focus on anything.”

  “Me either.”

  We laughed as we collapsed on the bed.

  “My ride just got here. I put your keys next to your purse on the table, Becky.”

  Oh yeah, I forgot about Dawn being here.

  “Thank you, Dawn! I owe you big time.”

  “Don’t think I won’t collect on it.” She laughed as she closed the door behind her.

  That is the last thing I remember…until eight o’clock in the morning.

  I opened my eyes and ran to the bathroom. I almost ran into Lynn. She was just walking out and looked exactly the way I felt. I just made it to the toilet, when it all came up. I didn’t have the strength to stand up, so I had to sit down. I sat there for who knows how long.

  My body was letting me know I needed to take care of other business. After I finished and turned around to flush, I looked down. I let out a scream.

  “What’s wrong?” Lynn asked.

  I flushed and then opened the door.

  “I think I’m gonna die, Lynn.”

  She gave me that crazy look. “What? Why do you say that?”

  “My shit was green!”

  Lynn looked at me for a moment before laughing. She bent over she was laughing so hard.

  “It isn’t funny!”

  “I’m sorry. I’m sorry.” She was still laughing.

  I stood there staring at her until she calmed down.

  “You know it was the dye, right?”

  “Huh?”

  “Whatever they put in that damn drink. Tell me why we drank so much. My head is pounding.”

  That made sense…I guess. All I knew for sure was that I was headed back to the bathroom. It looks like hugging the toilet is how I am going to spend my day.

  After sitting in the floor for what seemed like forever, I got up and walked over to the sink. I rinsed out my mouth with cold water and then splashed my face. I still felt like shit, but I knew this was as good as it was going to get for now.

  “Your phone has been vibrating.”

  I walked out of the bathroom to check my calls.

  Shit!

  Ten missed calls.

  Four from Chad and the rest…my mother.

  If my head wasn’t already pounding, it would be now.

  “Did Chad try calling your phone?” I asked Lynn.

  “Let me see.” I watched as she checked her calls.

  Lynn looked up at me with the ‘oh shit’ expression, so I knew there were missed calls from him.

  “It looks like he called about three times and your mother called, too. Joy, joy! Barry called about seven times. I mean, really? Don’t get me started on the messages he sent. He says he knows we went out last night, and wants to know how many men we picked up. Can you believe the nerve of him? I hate him!” She was shouting at the end.

  I closed my eyes. It felt like someone had taken a hammer to my head.

  “Are you ok, Becky?”

  I opened my eyes and then narrowed them at her. “If you shout one more time you won’t be.”

  “Sorry, Beck. It just pissed me off that he sent me those messages. And not only that, who told him we were going out?”

  “It doesn’t make sense. Chad knew we were going out, and the only other person we spoke with was Dawn. She would never say anything.”

  “I trust Dawn.”

  I just looked at her. I knew what she was implying. Surely, Chad wouldn’t have called Barry.

  “I’ll call Chad.”

  I sat down on the bed. It rang twice with no answer. On the third ring, he finally answered.

  “Where are you?” He shouted into the phone.

  I had to hold it away from my ear. Lynn gave me the ‘what the hell’ look. I took a deep breath. My stomach was starting to roll again. Hopefully, I will make it through this conversation without puking.

  “Please don’t shout in my ear.” It came out as a whisper.

  “You disappear for hours and you expect me to be calm. Unbelievable!” I could hear the anger in his voice.

  “I told you last night I was going out with Lynn. I drank a little too much, and fell asleep before I could call you.”

  “A little?” Lynn mumbled.

  I looked at her and shook my head.

  “I cannot believe you got drunk.” I could hear the condemnation in his tone.

  What. The. Hell?

  “I don’t know why you are so upset. I was responsible enough to stay where I was and not drive home.”

  “And where was that?”

  You know, his attitude is really pissing me off!

  “Lynn’s hotel room!”

  Raising my voice was not a good idea. My head was throbbing.

  “You’re at a hotel?”

  I sighed. “Well, no, technically it is not a hotel. We are at the only inn in town. I told you Lynn left Barry and she is staying here until they call her back about an apartment. Were you not listening to me yesterday?” I was getting frustrated with this conversation.

  There was silence on the other end of the line.

  “Oh.”

  That was all he said. ‘Oh.’

  REALLY!

  Un-fucking-believable!

  “Did you call Barry last night and tell him that Lynn and I were going out? Because he sent her some very hateful messages. He implied a lot of things. Some about me.”

  Silence again.

  “Chad?”

  “I’m here. Just waiting for you to be finished.” He still sounded angry.

  I didn’t think he could piss me off anymore. I was wrong!

  “I’m finished for now.” My impatience was growing.

  I could hear Chad take a deep breath.

  “Look, we have been friends with them for years. I thought I would give him a heads up. She moved out, but she is still his wife. I thought he ought to know.”

  To think I was defending him! It felt like a punch to the gut.

  “You thought he ought to know. Really? Okay.” I paused to gather my thoughts. “Um…I need to get off here. I don’t want to say anything I will regret later.”

  “Like what?” He growled.

  So…he wants to argue.

  “Bye, Chad. I will tal
k to you later. I refuse to have this conversation with you when you are obviously not willing to listen.”

  I ended the call. Yes, I did! I looked over at Lynn. She was sitting beside me on the bed.

  “I heard.” She was shaking her head.

  “I am so sorry, Lynn. I still can’t believe he felt he “owed” it to Barry to call him. That’s such bullshit.”

  “Yep. I agree. They’re both assholes.”

  We looked at each other and burst out laughing. I couldn’t agree more.

  CHAPTER 3

  Men suck! This isn’t something you don’t already know. Which is why Chad and I haven’t said much to each other since the night Lynn and I got hammered. He doesn’t understand why I so am upset with him telling Barry about our night out. I don’t understand how he could feel okay with it.

  I get that Lynn and Barry are still married, but she wants a divorce. If there were any doubts, they were erased when he sent her all those messages. Suggesting we could not go out without picking up men. How dare he! Lynn has never cheated on Barry. The fact that Chad did not comment on that made me take a step back for a minute. Barry implied me as well, but I didn’t hear Chad defend me.

  What is up with that?

  It didn’t take long before my mother heard about it. That woman must have a network of some sort. She didn’t have all the details, but I still had to listen to her go on and on about it.

  “I just don’t understand what has come over you, young lady.”

  She always talked to me like I was ten years old. At the same time, she had all these grown-up expectations. Marriage, babies, and whatever else she could come up with.

  “I am not a child, Mother.” I knew she hated it when I called her that.

  “I know you’re not a child.” The frustration was evident in her voice,

  “Then you need to back off. This is my life. MY life. I have to make my own choices and if I make mistakes, they will be mine to make.”

  She sighed. “I just don’t want you to make the same mistakes I made, Becky. If I can prevent you from being hurt, I will.”

  I groaned out of my own frustration and placed my hands on my hips. “If I am not hurt, how am I supposed to learn from my mistakes? Anyway, how is Lynn and I going out supposed to be hurting me?”

  “It is what people think. You don’t want it to ruin your reputation.”

  I laughed out loud.

  “I don’t see the humor in this.”

  “I know you don’t. If people want to believe gossip, then let them. If they don’t know me by now, they never will. I really don’t care.”

  “You should care. I’m sure Chad doesn’t want people to say such things about you.”

  “What things?”

  “That you are picking up men.”

  I held up my hand to stop her.

  “That is all coming from Barry, Lynn’s soon to be ex-husband.”

  My mother shrugged her shoulders.

  “It doesn’t matter who says it, people are already talking about it.”

  I rolled my eyes.

  “Good grief! He is blowing it out of proportion. Going to get a few drinks does not mean we are going to screw anybody.”

  “Watch your language. I don’t care how old you are.” She pointed her finger at me.

  I looked away.

  “Mother, the point is, this is my life. I am in charge of making myself happy. It doesn’t matter what you or anyone else says.”

  My mother sighed again. “I guess I wasted a trip over here then. I just wanted to help. You know I can’t get around like I used to.”

  So, the guilt trip has begun. My mother has rheumatoid arthritis. I know she is in a lot of pain. I have seen it on a daily basis for years. However, she uses it when she wants to make me feel guilty about something.

  I watched as she stood up with the assistance of her cane. She stood there and stared at me. I am sure she was trying to see if I was affected by her words. I would like to say I am never bothered by her words, but that would be a lie. She tries to guilt me because she knows she can. I have felt guilty in the past for going away to school when she needed me to be at home to help out. I helped as much as I could from a distance. I even came home sometimes on the weekend to make sure everything was alright.

  That sense of responsibility. My family has always known I will here no matter what.

  “Thank you for stopping by, Mother. Don’t worry about me. Please. Just let me make my own mistakes.”

  She looked at me for a moment before nodding.

  “I love you, Becky.” She hugged me.

  “I love you, too.”

  I opened the door and watched her walk to her car. Once she was safely inside, I closed the door.

  Well, another fun-filled day in my life.

  I decided to see if my editor had sent me an email. I was scanning through tons of junk before I found what I was looking for.

  The subject: Meeting.

  I had goose bumps all of a sudden. I clicked on the email. Gwen wants all of her writers to meet at the office in Fairhope on Monday. Today is Wednesday.

  Great!

  Any other time I would be happy to go, but with things being so tense with Chad, I find myself wanting to send her an excuse why I can’t be there. In most cases, some space would probably be good. Since my job requires me to travel, this won’t help at all.

  I sighed as I replied that I will be there.

  The afternoon quickly went by, and I received a text from Chad letting me know he would be home around 5:30 this evening.

  Not working over today? Huh.

  His only request? Chicken enchiladas. I took a quick inventory in my pantry and fridge. Thankfully, we already have everything we need. I checked the time. It’s 4:45. Yikes! Time to get busy.

  I was just taking the enchiladas out of the oven when I heard the door open.

  “Mmm, I smell something good.”

  I turned around to find Chad standing in the doorway.

  “I just took them out of the oven.” I took off the oven mitts and put them on the counter.

  Chad was quiet as he looked at me. I knew I was fidgeting under his watchful eyes.

  “I hate it when we fight.” His blue eyes seemed darker as he looked at me.

  I nodded. “Me too.”

  Chad walked into the kitchen and wrapped his arms around me. Something about his hugs always brought me comfort. I finally relaxed. I didn’t realize how tense I was since our heated argument.

  Chad pulled back slightly as his eyes focused on my lips. He gently caressed my cheek before leaning toward me to capture my lips. It was so soft and gentle. You know, the kind that gives you chills. He moved his lips to my cheeks and then to my forehead before gently kissing my lips again.

  I opened my eyes as Chad released me. He winked before swatting my ass with his hand.

  “I’m hungry.”

  I blinked. Oh, that’s right. The enchiladas.

  Chad chuckled. He knew the effect he had on me. It didn’t take very much effort on his part either. All he had to do was look at me with those mesmerizing eyes of his, and I was hook, line, and sinker. Every. Damn. Time.

  Chad carefully carried the dish to the table. We helped ourselves and quickly dug in. After each bite he looked at me with a twinkle in his eyes.

  Yep. I know that look,

  Make up sex.

  I sucked in a deep breath.

  He smirked.

  Damn!

  Chad slowly lowered his fork. He took a long drink from his glass. I heard him scoot his chair back, and watched as he walked around the table.

  I looked up and could not deny the hunger in his eyes. He reached for my hand.

  “I’m not finished yet.”

  I mean, a girl has to eat sometime.

  “Yes, you are. We have more important things to do.” Chad pulled me against his body.

  I softly gasped. I think I said, okay, but it came out so weak, I don’t know if
he heard me.

  Chad started kissing me softly just as he did before, but it soon intensified. Clothes were being quickly pulled off. Somehow he had guided us to our bedroom. I sat down on the bed and looked up at him. He looked at me with hooded eyes. Desire was rolling off him in waves, and I wanted to drink it up.

  I gently grabbed his cock and heard Chad take a sharp breath. I smiled at the way he responded to me. I knew he wanted me to take him into my mouth, but I loved to drive him crazy first. I slowly ran my tongue over the vein on the underside of his cock. I heard a hiss as I moved my tongue up and down that spot. I swirled my tongue around the head and tasted a drop of pre-cum.

  His fingers were digging into my shoulders as Chad pushed me back. He saw the question in my eyes.

  “I don’t think I will last much longer if you keep doing that. And…I want this to last.”

  He leaned down and kissed me. Probing my mouth with his tongue. He grabbed my legs and I wrapped them around his waist. It took him no time to guide himself into my wet entrance. I was more than ready. I shuddered as I felt inch by inch slide into me. Chad was going torturously slowly. His thumb touched my clit and gasped when he increased the pressure. His thumb rubbed in a circular motion.

  Fuck! That felt so good!

  His moans quickly matched mine.

  “Fuck, Becky. You feel so damn good. So wet, just for me.” He growled.

  I wanted to speak but by that time he pushed my knees to my chest, hooking my legs over his shoulders. He pulled back before slamming back into me. Chad this a couple more times. Maybe more. I don’t know. I couldn’t think anymore. I could just feel him thrusted in and out at a frenzied pace.

  I screamed out in ecstasy over and over. Chad’s voice joined mine as we were fully spent. He collapsed on top of me.

  “Damn.” He chuckled.

  I smiled. Damn is right! We needed make up sex more often.

  Chad rolled off me and walked to the bathroom. I heard the shower start, so I walked in there to join him.

  The crisp, clean scent of his shampoo filled the bathroom.

  I loved that smell. It was all Chad.

  As I stepped into the shower, he looked over his shoulder. I watched as he reached for my shampoo. He grabbed my hand and pulled me to him. My hands pressed against his chest. He leaned down and captured my lips. Chad pulled me under the flow of water as he continued to kiss me. I felt his fingers in my hair as it became drenched with the water.